Thursday, March 25, 2010

Facing Change

The change that I am going through right now is personal, which is being pregnant. When I found out that I was pregnant it was very difficult to accept it. I was already beginnig to make all this plans for my family and myself, so finiding out that I was pregnant changed everything. I had to change my eating habits, start going to doctor appointmenst, taking prenatals, limit myself to certain activities, and doing my everyday task differently at home and at work. My life style has changed, I get tired faster and my body is going through hormonal changes so making adjustments was a big change but now I feel good.

At this moment I am in the "acceptance" stage. I feel that now I have accepted my pregnancy and all the changes that are coming along. I did go through to denial, isolation, guilt, and anger since this is my fourth pregnancy. It took me a lot to accept but now that I see my growing belly and have seen my baby through the ultra-sound , this has changed my feelings towards the pregnancy and now I am 100% happy and accept my pregnancy along with my changes.

Friday, February 26, 2010

Caring for Ourselves

There are many things that have brought joy into my life but If I had to choose three, they would be the day I got married,giving birth, and celebrating my 30th birthday.

When I got married I felt lots of joy. Like any other woman, I was so excited to finally wear my wedding dress and look like a princess. It was the day that I married the most wonderful man in my life. I have always dreamed about this day and I just wanted everyhting to be perfect. This day is unforgetable, we made our promises as husband and wife.We had our family and friends be part of this joyful moment. My wedding day was a joyful moment in my life and I would do it again! This was the begining of a new life for me and when I look back, I wouldn't change a thing. My wedding day was joy,joy, and joy.

Giving birth is another part of my life that has giving me plenty of joy into my life. It's an expirience that only one cannot explain. I have given birth three times and they have all been joyful moments.  I just know that when they were born and to hear their first cry was the most wonderful moment in my life. It was painful to have them but when they come out, it was the most amazing feeling, that I just forgot about the pain. This is why giving birth to my daughters is another joyful expirience in my life.

My other joyful experience was when I turned 30 years old. I went to Las Vegas to celebrate my birthday with family and friends. This was very fun for me to have  celebrate my birthday in Vegas. It was a while since I did anything fun, since I have three daughters and I'm always busy taking care of everything but myself. This was a weekend full of joy and lots of fun. I felt like a kid at a candy store, I was too excited and had a great time with my family and friends. The pictures say it all. On our way to Las Vegas, we were playing that song "I got a feeling" so now when I hear this song it so reminds me of Vegas.

This are a few things that are joyful in my life.

Thursday, February 18, 2010

Combination Feelings

I am currently going throught a combination of feelings myself. I just found out that I am pregnant and ofcourse this would be a happy moment for me but it is not. I am married and already have three beautiful girls and according to my husband and me we were done. It so happen that I go for a regular check-up and find out that I am 5 weeks pregnant. I am feeling fear, anger, sadness, and shame, and deep down I do feel some happiness. I feel like starting all over again with a baby will hold me back from the plans that I had for myself and family. I do feel some joy because I know that my husband, family, and friends are very supported. For now I do feel a mixture of feelings and emotions but I hope to get them together.

Friday, February 12, 2010

nelly's blog

This is confusing.... but I am working on it.